分类: 日记

活着而已

[ 2006-06-17 17:11:32 | 作者: Yetin ]
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时间过得真快，又半个多月没有写了，不是不想坚持，总是发现自己没有什么所写的，写技术，自己本来就很无知，没什么可写，生活琐事，似乎也认为没有必要，思想，我这人好像也没有什么思想。该宣泄的都已经宣泄了，一切都过去了。
回学校也有半个月了，说是做毕业设计，其实什么也没有做什么，反正也是应付一下任务，糊弄过关就行了。
我发现自己从来都不是一个安分守己的人，似乎也对未来没有抱太多的幻想。就像我频繁的换blog程序一样，到现在这事换的第3个了。最近的心情是好了很多，也没有什么要担心的，生活还得继续，人不能总是生活在阴暗之中，总得想办法让自己快乐，也不用总是担心被人，说是担心别人，似乎还是在为自己担心。
前段时间思想波动很大，一个人在南京，没有朋友，每天都面对着同样的人，同样的事，每天都是心神不宁，根本就没有安心做事，好像这个世界没有什么属于我的，我都不知道自己是谁了。表面上看有些事情好像满不在乎，内心每天都被它所困扰，整天魂不守舍。我不知道自己是不是一个专一的人，也许不是吧！很多时候都是一是热情么？我也不知道！有些事情似乎一辈子都忘不掉，我发现自己总是生活在回忆之中。我是一个记仇的人么，不是，很多事情忘记得很快，不知道怎么有的事情却总是一直困扰着我呢？不知道是不是时间的问题？也许就是我的一是热情，今天的下场就是我应该得到的回报吧！
经常想做一些事，有很多很多理想，感觉自己有很多很多要实现的梦想，但似乎从来没有付诸行动，每天都是在那里虚度光阴！这个世界从来不是属于我的，每天我所作的就是为了活着而已，人到底是为了什么而活着，我现在都有些迷茫了，出去了一趟，就不想再出去了，怕！想安稳的过日子，现实却不允许。再过半个月大家都要各奔东西了，很多人也许一辈子都见不到了，不想看到那一幕，很残酷！
好了，接下来的几天该享受了！
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